The Alpha's Hidden Luna novel
The old man who had played a big role in my husbands court squinted at me, his eyes filled with doubt.
Are you really sure about this, Vienna? Where will you go if you separate from the Alpha?
My lips thinned at that question. Cant I find a job for myself? The city is wide, and if I cant stay here because of my husbands orders, then Ill try another one. As long as I can finally live like a human being.
Ive got plenty of money under my name, Beta. I saved throughout the seven years of our marriage, I told him. From my own earnings.
He chuckled at me. He was getting old, and soon his son would take his place.
I guess this is farewell to the best Gamma of the court? The old man hugged me and then let go.
Farewell
With the envelope in hand, I turned away from the council court, where my life for the past seven years had revolved solely around being his Gamma.
Who wouldve thought Id end up in this pathetic, miserable place in life, even though Im not the type to give up on anything? All because I married a man who never saw me as more than a convenient name to preserve his reputation.
On our wedding day, I married the man Id loved since I was seven. I was the happiest woman alive, unaware it was the worst day of his life. To him, I was nothing but a poor substitute for the woman he truly loved.
Im here now, I announced.
Alpha Rowan was there, setting food on the table. To anyone else, it wouldve looked like he was a caring, romantic husband. But the truth?
What took you so long at the court? You shouldve come home first to handle the food, right? His voice was sharp, and he didnt even glance at me.
He wasnt romantic. He just had no choice but to cook for himself because I was late. He was hungry, and there was no one else to rely on.
Sorry I walked over to the table and looked at what he had prepared. It was just for him.
I wasnt surprised. He sat at the head of the table and ignored me completely, wearing a smug expression like he was proud I wouldnt be eating anything since he didnt include me.
What do you want? he asked coldly.
Can you sign this, Alpha? I pulled the documents out of the envelope.
His face darkened. He hated paperwork at home, but he knew it had to be serious if I brought it to him.
Cant that wait? he scoffed.
No I started, but his phone rang.
He perked up like a hero answering a distress call.
Dea. I shut my eyes the moment he said her name. My sister. The woman he truly loved but couldnt marry. Yes, Im coming. I have all the time for you. Wait for me.
He hung up and glanced at me sideways. He pushed the plate in my direction.
Eat this. Dea needs me.
But you havent signed the papers. Its important, I insisted.
His jaw clenched. Without hesitation, he grabbed the papers. He signed them all and slammed the pen on the table.
There. You know I hate it when you push me. Clean before you sleep. Make breakfast too, so youre useful around here.
He sounded angry, but his face looked almost delighted as he took his coat and left without even asking what those papers were.
I slowly opened the documents and read them. He signed the divorce. He signed the resignation. I was walking out of his life, and his final words to me were chores.
Thats right. In this house, I was in charge of everything. Not to make it feel like a home, like a wife should, but to clean it like a maid. He said we didnt need to hire help because I was already here. That was my role. To him, I was like my mother, who once served in my birth familys house. No matter how I dressed, Id always be a woman from dirt.
Even if blue blood runs through my veins because Im a daughter of one of the elders. I was never counted because the moon goddess overlooked me. To be born as a human in a family of lycans, I am considered a curse and misfortune. My own parentswho was supposed to love mewas the one suggested of switching me with the maid's daughter. Shes the lucky child, born on the same day as me, and the one with a lycan's mark and blood. Thats why my parents chose to have her and made me a maid's daughter. They'll always chose Dea. And Rowan, my husband hes choosing her too. Because I was never supposed to be his wife if Dea hadnt run away that day. I was the substitute bride. The unwanted wife in this house. A working Gamma in his council. And now, as I sealed the envelope again, a tear slipped down my cheek.
Now Ill be a divorced Luna.
No ones choosing me I whispered, staring at the plate of food meant for someone else but pushed on me. I am a dumpster for all of them.
I just chose myself, Rowan. By divorcing you, I said through the pain.
I never had a pleasant life at all. Or maybe I had but it crumbled when I was fifteen years old.
Youre not my daughter. Youre the daughter of the elder family of the Morsettis.
Those were my mothers final words before she took her last breath.
She confessed everything in front of the very people she claimed were my real parents. I didnt even have time to grieve. The truth broke, and the Morsettis heard it, along with a member of a court who happened to be there.
To control the scandal, they confirmed everything and offered explanations I never asked for. But nothing eased the shock in my chest or the fury building inside me.
We had to set you aside, Vienna, said Donna, the mother who gave birth to me. Our family is influential. We had to make the right choice for our name and that is to present Dea as the legal daughter of this elder family."
We couldnt let a mere human represent the Morsettis. You wouldnt want to be a laughing stock, right? Or be the cause of our downfall, my father added, as if casting me aside had been for my benefit too. "And this truth should never come out."
I didnt say another word. I'm cold.
Does this mean youre switching us back, Dad? Dea asked. Her voice was calm, but her eyes were sharp and cold as they landed on me.
She had always worn a mask. Sweet, angelic, while hiding the devil just beneath the surface.
No, father answered. We cant do that. Not now. It would stir up everything weve worked to suppress.
Then he turned to me and took my hand. But well support you. We can send you to school, Vienna. Well provide everything for you.
That moment told me everything. They would never claim me as their daughter. Not in front of everyone and in their heart. Still, they sent me to school. I used to think that was enough.
I used to envy Dea. She had it all. My real parents. My rightful life. Even the man I loved.
She and Rowan were always meant to be. Childhood sweethearts who grew into lovers. Their engagement had been celebrated for years. The wedding was just a formality. But the night before the official announcement, Dea vanished, and the Morsettis had to play their last card to the Donovans. Me.
Now Im here. Trapped in a marriage without love. A Luna whos treated like a Gamma under her own husband. But today, Ill put an end to it.
I packed all my clothes and belongings. What I could keep went into a suitcase. The rest was left for disposal. Everything had to be gone before I left this place.
Whats all this for?
Rowans voice came from behind.
Hed just returned. From Deas home, where he had spent the night.
Theyre things I no longer use, I answered, referring to the clothes he once bought for me out of obligation.
Youre throwing them away? Thats not like you, he said, suspicious.
Of course he knew that. I was once the daughter of a maid who held onto every little thing. Nothing ever went to waste.
Ill donate them to your foundations charity. Itll be good for your public image, especially with your new government partnership.
His expression flickered. Shocked. Id never said anything like that before. But then, slowly, he nodded, a faint smile forming at the corners of his mouth.
I thought he might thank me. But another voice interrupted.
My sister is such a generous soul. So big-hearted and understanding.
There she was. Dea. Wearing a dress I once believed Rowan had picked out for me.
She smiled sweetly and made her way toward him. Then, suddenly, she ran the last few steps and jumped into his arms, accidentally bumping into a nearby vase.
It hit the floor and shattered.
I gasped. That vase, one of Rowans familys most treasured heirlooms. A wedding gift from his father, etched with our names and our joined hands. A symbol of love and unity in their bloodline.
I had always kept it spotless. I planned to take it with me. It reminded me that even if I had a cruel husband, I once had in-laws who loved me.
But it is gone now. Shattered.
Still, Rowan didnt flinch. He didnt even look. If it wasnt important to him, why should I care?
Are you hurt? Im sorry, Dea, he said instead. He ran his hands over her arms, checking for scratches. Apologizing to her. The one who broke it.
Sorry, Dea said, glancing at me.
I swallowed hard. And nodded.
Its nothing, Rowan added. We can always buy a new one.
I pressed my lips into a thin line. No need. It was just your fathers wedding gift. I was planning to auction it off anyway.
I only said it to wound him. And it worked. His face changed. First in surprise, then in anger.
You want to auction that? Our wedding gift?
But she broke it now, I said calmly.
He fell silent. He remembered. It wasnt my fault. It was her.
Sorry, Vienna. I didnt mean to, Dea murmured, eyes lowered now.
I wondered why she was even here. Did she come just to cause a scene?
Ill have this cleaned up, Rowan muttered. In the meantime Dea will be staying in this room. Just for a week. She needs sunlight, and this one gets the most.
Then he looked at me like it was nothing. Youll move to the guest room, Vienna.
And just like that, he pushed me out of my room. Of what little was left of my place in this house.
Surely, you wont say no to your sisters request, right? Dea leaned against my husbands shoulder after Rowan dropped that bomb on me.
My chest tightened. She wants to provoke me, for me to get mad and lash out on them, but I said nothing to challenge it.
Request? That wasnt a request. It was an order. One that didnt even require my consent.
We never shared a room like real couples do. He never wanted to. He once told me we could use my room if I wanted to mate with him, but not his. He said he didn't want his space "tainted" by anything about sex. But he didnt know I was aware of what he was really doing. Hed bring Dea here, into his room, whenever I came home late from court. Or when I was asleep, too exhausted to hear their whispers and footsteps.
Its only for a week, Vienna. You can have your room back when
Okay. She can have it, I cut him off with a nod. I turned away and went back to packing.
O...kay? Rowan echoed, confused.
I shot him a cold glance. He expected me to fight for it, just like before. He expected tears, pleading, rage. But there was none of that now. Because whats the point of fighting for something that was never mine to begin with?
Im letting her have it like you requested, I said simply.
Dea squealed in delight.
See, love? My sister always understands.
Rowan didnt look pleased. For a second, I thought my indifference bothered him. But instead of asking how I felt, he walked away, carrying his pride with him. Dea, of course, stayed, wanting the last word, like she always did.
Hows it like being his wife only in bed? she asked with a wicked grin. Oh wait, do you two still mate? Does he even kiss you? I doubt it. Hes with me every night, like he cant get enough of me. I bet hes forgotten what you taste like.
I didnt speak.
She laughed at my silence. Bitch. Thats what you get for stealing my life. It will never be yours. Everything is mine, Vienna.
She stomped her heel next to my foot, trying to provoke me, and smiled smugly.
Your husbands staying in this house tonight, she added. But hell be sleeping with me. And the poor Luna? Shell spend the night alone, cold and forgotten, while hes holding me close.
And just like that, the nightmare became real.
I passed by my room and heard it. Their sounds. Her moans. His voice. Their pleasure. The bed creaked in rhythm, the walls soaked in betrayal. That room, once the only place I could breathe in this house, was now a shrine to my humiliation.
He never held me like that. Never kissed me like that. When we mated, he didnt even look me in the eye. He never touched me out of affection. For him, I was nothing but a duty. An obligation.
Youre the only woman who could make me feel this way, Dea, I heard him say.
And that was it.
I stopped walking. A sob slipped from my lips before I could catch it. I froze. I wasnt even aware Id started crying.
I was still hurting.
I was still hoping.
And that was the most humiliating part.
I pulled my phone out with trembling fingers and walked away from the noise, further and further, until their pleasure was only a dull echo in the background.
I opened a number saved long ago. One I never deleted, even when I should have.
Diego, Im divorcing Rowan. Please pick me up after a month.
That was the message I sent to the only man I knew would never turn me away.
Seconds later, my phone rang.
I answered, my voice already breaking. Diego
He made you cry again? he said coldly. Is that why youre suddenly trying to divorce him again?
Shame flooded me. I had tried to leave Rowan before. I had promised Diego before. But I didnt follow through. I stayed. I chose the man who never chose me. And Diego waited, only to be hurt by my cowardice.
I mean it this time, I whispered. Im sorry for before, but please help me again.
I heard his deep sigh over the line. The kind that sounded like he was holding in more than just disappointment.
It shouldve been me, Yen, he said, using the nickname only he and my mother used to call me. It shouldve been me, so you wouldnt have to live like this.
I broke down at the weight of his voice. I wasnt just hurting, I had hurt him too. I chose Rowan. And now I was paying for it.
Ill wait, he said after a pause. But after a month, whether you change your mind or not, youre leaving with me. Youre divorcing him. And youre marrying me.
His words were final.
I clutched my chest, looking back toward the room filled with betrayal.
Rowan had his happiness. Why couldnt I have mine?
I wont change my mind, Diego, I said firmly. Once the divorce is final, Im marrying you. I promise.
If I could love a man like Rowan this deeply then maybe I could love Diego even more.
And this time, I will choose the man who would choose me back.
Have you cooked breakfast already? That was the first thing he said to me this morning.
They were holding each others hands like a married couple in front of me. How ironic. I had no plans of running into them, but they woke up early. I didnt expect that.
I cooked their breakfast and ate mine. I dont want to sit and eat with them.
I did. You can eat now, I said.
Thank you, sis, my sister replied, looking at me with triumph. At first, I didnt understand why. I thought it was because of what happened last night between them. But when my eyes moved to her body, I realized she was wearing my dress.
Oh, sorry. I had to wear this because last night I couldnt walk anymore. I got so limp, he made me so tired. Rowan asked me to wear this dress of yours. Is it okay? she asked, pretending to be innocent.
Its okay, Dea. I will have someone buy her new clothes, Rowan said. Tons of it in exchange for that.
No, its okay. I actually planned to burn that dress since its old and overused. I see it as trash. She can have it if she wants. Everything inside that drawer is hers now, I answered coldly.
I saw Deas face contort in shock, anger, and embarrassment. All because I called her someone who happily accepts my trash.
Ill change before breakfast, love, she said quickly and turned her back, trying to save herself. I have to wear something else.
That left me alone with Rowan. I was about to head back to my room when he spoke again.
I have a party to attend later. I want you to come with me, he said.
I froze in surprise and looked at him. Why?
He never brought me to any parties as his wife, only as the gamma. We were always separate, only together during project events. And now
Of course youll be there. Youre the gamma. You know all about my project, right? Dont overdress. Stay unnoticed. You have to attend. Dont give me your drama, he said before walking away.
Another obligation. See? He will never want to be seen with me and let the city know Im his wife. To him, I am just the gamma. But Im resigned. If only he knew.
I had no choice but to follow his orders. I used the drivers car that night because he left early. I didnt know why. I didnt even ask. But when I arrived at the venue at the same time as his car, I saw he wasnt alone.
In his arms, my sister clung to him tightly, flashing a smile and overdressed. He told me to wear plain clothes to stay unnoticed while he flaunted his mistress.
Stay behind us always, he told me once I approached.
I rolled my eyes, and Dea saw it. She responded with a smirk before they walked toward the entrance. Their arrival was announced and applauded. Mine was dismissed and ignored.
Alpha, this way is your seat. We heard youre married, so we prepared one for your wife too, one of the greeters said.
I knew hed dismiss the wife part and reject the seat. He always did. So my eyes started looking for my own chair.
Yes, thank you.
Surprised, I turned to him because he never accepted a seat for me. I wasnt planning to sit there even if he wanted me to. But when I saw Dea sitting on it, a smirk on her lips, I turned away so they wouldnt see my face flush in disappointment.
Never did I sit in that wifes chair. But his mistress could. A lump formed in my throat. I found myself heading to the restroom.
But I hadnt been there long when Dea followed me.
Look whos here, she taunted. Even your real parents and your husband wont choose you over me, right?
She reapplied her bright red lipstick and kept throwing remarks at me.
Bye, loser, she said, sticking her tongue out before leaving me there.
I cried again. The anxiety was eating me up, so I stayed in the restroom longer. But when I finally returned, I didnt expect to find a cheerful party anymore. The curtains were already burning, and everyone was in chaos.
Panic rose in me, especially when the ceiling looked like it would collapse. I had to run for my life. People were screaming at the entrance and exit. They were pushing each other.
I walked and ran, desperate to escape. But I got stuck in the crowd. I was shoved multiple times, bodies colliding into me, arms slamming against different parts of mine.
I could hardly breathe, but my eyes searched for Rowan. I couldnt find him anymore.
Tears fell from my eyes as the realization sank in. They were gone. He must have saved Dea first and left me. He didnt even try to go back. He didnt even send someone to look for me.
Argh! I cried when someones heel stomped on my foot and another elbow hit my stomach.
My vision blurred. The noise faded. My body grew cold as my stomach throbbed and something inside felt like it was being pulled out of me. Until finally, darkness pulled me in. No one came to save me. No husband arrived to rescue me from the burning building or the panicking crowd.
No one.
Shes stable now. Shell be fine, Mr. Fiasco.
I opened my eyes when I heard that voice. It wasnt familiar to me, nor was the room I woke up in.
Youre awake, Luna, I heard Beta say.
W-why am I here? I croaked.
My body felt so heavy and tired. I couldnt remember anything after hitting the glass door while escaping the fire.
My son saved you before the halls ceiling collapsed, Luna. You were brought here to the hospital and he sighed deeply.
I tried to sit up, but there was a strange pain in my stomach I couldnt explain, so I held it tightly.
And what, Beta Alex?
His eyes saddened, and he let out another sigh. Youre pregnant, Luna. You didnt know that?
My eyes widened. It took a long moment before his words registered in my brain.
P-pregnant? I whispered, shocked and anxious. Then I clutched my stomach. T-then, is the baby okay?
I was so hopeful. After everything I had been through, after almost dying, I thought maybe there would be one good thing to come from it.
But the longer Beta Alex stayed silent, the colder I felt. The ache in my stomach grew sharper.
You lost the baby, Luna. Im so sorry for that.
And just like that, the glimmer of joy I thought would erase the trauma of last night disappeared. I shut my eyes as tears tried to fall. I didnt deserve to cry.
I l-lost my baby and and its my fault I whispered. Maybe if I hadnt locked myself in the bathroom with my ugly thoughts, maybe I could have escaped earlier.
Maybe I wouldnt have had to fight through the crowd, and I could have made it out safely.
The alpha doesnt know yet that youre here. Hes busy because Dea Morsettis sprained her ankle while running
sprained her ankle? I gasped and looked at Beta Alex. And hes there, t-taking care of her while Im here and I lost o-our son? I said through clenched teeth.
I hated that the words came out of me, but it hurt more that Beta Alex didnt deny it. His eyes said enough.
It felt like being stabbed again and again. All I could do was hold my stomach and mourn the life that should have still been there.
I shouldnt have been at that party if it werent for Rowan. How could he not even try to find me?
The doctor said you must stay here for three more days.
If I could, Id stay here for a month just to avoid going home. But I knew the hospital wouldnt allow that.
I spent every night crying. Mourning for the child I never even got to hold. Our parents wanted us to have a baby, believing it would strengthen our bond and secure the packs future.
They sent us to an island last month. Rowan did mate with me there, but only for his own pleasure. I could count on one hand the moments I felt any happiness while he used my body. I could count them, but I couldnt even remember them now.
I never expected anything would come of it. He didnt care if we had a child or not. I was the only one who wouldve been happy. And now
I am the only one grieving for you, baby I whispered into the air.
I failed, didnt I? As a person and now as a mother.
I thought being in the hospital would protect me from the stress outside. But then I received an email from my mother. It read, Did you know that your sister sprained her ankle? You couldnt even send her flowers? She sprained it because of you. I heard you threw a tantrum over a simple seat. If she didnt follow you, maybe she wouldnt have gotten hurt. Youre so immature!
A humorless laugh escaped from my lips. I couldnt believe what I was reading. Now it was my fault? Because of a minor incident she caused herself? What about me? Who do I blame for losing my baby?
Dea has my husband caring for her while I lie here shattered. And still, Im the villain? The immature one?
Ill never be enough for any of them, not even my own parents.
They knew I was at the party and the fire. But no one asked if I made it out alive. All they cared about was Dea.
Dark thoughts flooded my mind as I stared out the hospital window. Only one solution echoed.
I pulled out my IV and stepped closer.
It was exactly twelve o'clock. October 23. My birthday.
And all I wanted was to end it all. My life.
I sobbed uncontrollably while inching my foot toward the glass window. Just then, my phone rang. I jumped in shock, a broken whimper escaping from my lips until it turned into cries.
I answered the call without meaning to. I tried to cover my mouth so the caller wouldnt hear.
Yen, I cannot wait for a month. Ill take you after this week. Ill have you.
But when I heard that voice I broke down. I heard him cursing softly under his breath.
What the hell happened, Yen? Did he hurt you again? he asked, trying to stay calm.
This man he saved me, didnt he? From the beginning until now. The man I couldnt choose has always been the one saving me, even without knowing it.
I sniffled and hugged the phone to my chest. D-Diego t-tomorrow fetch me, please.
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